Bitter
Wow...I have met my share of horrible people. Right now, I'm trying not to beat the shit out of this girl for being the monster she is. Trying to calm down before I get to see her self-centered, hideous face again. The only person who actually was foolish enough to give a damn about this waste of flesh is realizing now that she was used. I thought I was a horrible fuck up/disappointment to the ones I love, but this soulless, greedy wretch has shown me I'm not as bad as I thought. I at least try to help people I care about. It was sickening to watch one girl drowning while her "best friend" couldn't even give her a place to stay (this "best friend" used her mother as an excuse so she could go and sleep at her pimps house. The only person to care about this wretch, she wouldn't help...). I know humans can be pretty wretched, but it is disturbing to see how low they can really go.
Now I wait for something horrible to happen to this wretch so I can feel better about the world. She definately has no one now.
I'm feeling rather ill, mostly from restraining myself and going to sleep angry. Also the difference in barometric pressure seems to have made me ill (dizzy, on the verge of throwing up, migraines and having to force food into myself due to my constant upset stomach).
Currently, I'd love a drink to calm me down a bit.
The movie "It" (1929 silent film) was on the other night. I love that movie, but it has made me sad and jealous of Clara Bow's character (only the character as Clara Bow had an awful life). Bleh...Oh well, a good distraction from the soap opera world around me is the thought of having a one and only. Or maybe I just miss sex (that sounds more like me).
One of my close friends is moving thousands of miles away. I have to make it home before his going away party, as I know I'm going to miss him and will regret getting to say goodbye. I really wish I could mentally handle his level of social butterfly. It exhausts me to deal with him after a long day when I want to be alone, curled up in bed, but I know my time with him is limited so I try my best to keep up.
Now I wait for something horrible to happen to this wretch so I can feel better about the world. She definately has no one now.
I'm feeling rather ill, mostly from restraining myself and going to sleep angry. Also the difference in barometric pressure seems to have made me ill (dizzy, on the verge of throwing up, migraines and having to force food into myself due to my constant upset stomach).
Currently, I'd love a drink to calm me down a bit.
The movie "It" (1929 silent film) was on the other night. I love that movie, but it has made me sad and jealous of Clara Bow's character (only the character as Clara Bow had an awful life). Bleh...Oh well, a good distraction from the soap opera world around me is the thought of having a one and only. Or maybe I just miss sex (that sounds more like me).
One of my close friends is moving thousands of miles away. I have to make it home before his going away party, as I know I'm going to miss him and will regret getting to say goodbye. I really wish I could mentally handle his level of social butterfly. It exhausts me to deal with him after a long day when I want to be alone, curled up in bed, but I know my time with him is limited so I try my best to keep up.
posted by Nico | 17:18
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