Overwhelmed Heart...

I think I'm just lonely or horny or I just love people who I'm the happiest around.
This is rediculous but when I think of it enough, it's typical of me. She is new to my life and of course taken. The very first thing I think she said to me was "You are so beautiful," and continued drinking. Everyone does their thing and we sit together talking or behave a little mischievious. The last "relationship" that I was in, I couldn't even think of him the way I think of her. Of course I don't expect a thing to happen outside of gaining a really awesome partner in crime.

Sometimes I wish I had a job so I could go back to enjoying life...Too broke to go see Pineapple Express (which I have been looking forward to seeing...oddly enough...), too broke for cigarettes and booooze (which really shouldn't be a huge loss)...and whatever else I waste my time on.
I've had the artsy itch this year (moreso with this new and exciting person in my life who also happens to be an artist. I know more musicians than anything else so now I have someone who enjoys being creative without a loud penis extention...tho she plays guitar and I can make the piano sound like it's dying) and really need to get everything out of my head.
This morning while forgetting to sleep (I probably do need a reminder when I'm sleeping alone), I caught up on this quilt I started years ago. It's scary looking and nothing to look at on a hallucinegenic-like substance (or without schizo meds). This hideous monster will one day be complete (and I might be proud of it when it's done and crushing me during the winter).
Finished drawing out a tattoo...
Reading a lot...
Mutilating clothes I don't wear so I will want to wear them...
Now I need to work on some glass rings and whatever else my little brain needs to do.

I had a dream that he's avoiding me because he's with an ex. It wasn't like we were that close and I would love it if he could be happy (and not resentful or vengeful...).

I'm excited for some future plans...(just don't get too excited or expect too much as nothing can be perfect for too long...at least not in my life.)